We know that Amaliah is like a Big Sis and sometimes our DMs have been filled with requests for advice on a range of life issues including relationships, friendships or work troubles.

We have started a new segment where we field dilemmas from the community and answer them as frankly as we can with love, truth and honesty.

Need some advice on a dilemma? Send them all here!

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Hi Aunt Maya. I am an artist and a graphic designer and have a passion for it; however, the industry has gotten extremely competitive and freelance work does not provide me with a regular paycheck. My parents are after me to pursue another, more stable degree and career, but the thought of doing something I don’t like sounds soul-crushing. I do eventually want to build up enough savings so I can move out of my parents’ home, but I am also scared that going into a new career might be a waste of time, or I’ll pick something I can’t finish and feel bored with. I am so confused!

Maya Areem Responds:

Asalamu Alaykum,

Thank you for writing in and being so honest about what you’re feeling. This kind of crossroads can feel confusing, and it’s not an easy place to be.

When parents push us towards stability, it usually stems from love and fear; they don’t want us to struggle the way they may have. When your career and lifestyle choices go against the grain of what parents expect, it can feel hard battling your own conviction that you are on the right path vs. their pressure and expectations. It can also be suffocating when you’re told to let go of something you love doing. What’s important is recognising that whatever decision you make has to work for you both practically and emotionally.

It is also worth mentioning that the struggles you face are against a global backdrop of capitalism, job insecurity and cost-of-living pressures. Such a setup often pushes us to abandon our passions or work that makes us feel alive. I deeply empathise with your position. 

It doesn’t have to be an all-or-nothing choice. Perhaps you can try and work on making your freelance practice more stable while taking on another role in the industry that provides steady pay, even if it’s in a different capacity. Many creatives choose this path to free up headspace from financial worries while continuing their creative practice. Others stick with freelancing but only after saving enough to provide comfort in difficult months. Each option has trade-offs. What matters is asking yourself: which risks can I live with, and which will drain me?

Your fear of starting another career and finding it boring or a waste of time is a legitimate concern. But you don’t have to commit blindly. Before investing years in a degree or training, why not take a short course, volunteer, or shadow someone in a field that appeals to you? Sometimes what looks soul-crushing from the outside feels different in practice; other times it confirms what you knew already. Either way, you’ll be able to make choices based on experience and knowledge, and not fear.

It can also help to understand your non-negotiables. Make a list of what you need, financial stability, steady income, time for art, versus what you want, like creative freedom. This way, you can see areas where you can compromise, for example, a role that gives you enough security to not worry about rent, while still allowing space for design on the side.

Once you know your bottom line, you can start planning around it, instead of feeling paralysed by endless options. Ask yourself, in five years, would you regret not trying to take a more stable job? If the answer is yes, work it out backwards: what small steps can you take right now to give you that chance?

You can also start by building a buffer of savings before diving into anything new. When you know you have a safety net, it’s easier to make decisions from a place of calm rather than fear. Also, talk it through with mentors, peers, or artists who’ve made such transitions. Hearing their stories can normalise uncertainty and help you understand new perspectives. 

Next, set yourself a timeline: for example, “Over the next year, I’ll work in X role while keeping Y hours for freelance. Then I’ll re-evaluate.” Having a time frame can keep you moving instead of feeling stuck.

Over time, you can reassess if the freelance or design side could grow into something more stable, through teaching, selling work, or other streams. Remember: your skills as a freelancer and designer are not going anywhere. They’re tools you can always come back to if something else doesn’t work out. Trying something new won’t erase what you’ve already built; it will only expand what you can offer. 

It’s okay to re-pivot, to change your mind, and to accept that not every stage of life will look the same. Figuring life out is messy, but that’s what makes it real. May Allah ﷻ grant you clarity and barakah in everything you do. Ameen.

Love + Duas,

Aunt Maya

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If you would like some wisdom from Aunt Maya, send in your problems here! Please note Aunt Maya may consult the opinion of others from time to time and ask the Amaliah community for their advice too. Aunt Maya is not a licensed therapist or mental health professional.