University was one of the best yet most traumatic experiences of my life. After surviving the stress of four intense years of caffeine fuelled all nighters,  last moment essay submissions and 9 am lectures, I thought I was invincible. I was ready to start living my best adult life. Little did I know, I was not prepared for adulting at all. These are the emotional stages most graduates who didn’t land an instant corporate grad scheme goes through post-graduation.

1.Freedom

Nothing feels better than getting that diploma without tripping over yourself on stage. You survived and you’re ready to take on the world.

2. No more essay deadlines

No more lectures to pretend to go to. No more class attendance emails. no more deadlines. Just pure, unadulterated freedom.

3. When someone asks what’s next?

“So have you got a job yet? Are you planning to do a masters? When are you getting married?” Let a girl chill.

4. Panic

You’re two months into Netflix and Chill and funds are depleting fast. You might not even be able to afford to watch Netflix anymore. You don’t want to beg your parents for money; it’ll be like secondary school all over again, depending on their funds for freedom.

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5. Applying for 2000 jobs

Nobody tells you how hard applying for jobs is. Nobody really warns you how hard it is to work out what you want to do. What even is a cover letter??!? You’re considering applying for a masters, but the thought of writing essays again sends you into deeper despair. You’re having an existential crisis. You thought tantrums were a thing of the past, you’re supposed to be a big adult now, but you don’t even have adult shoes… *cries even louder*

6. Interviews and Rejections

You finally learn what rejection feels like. It’s heartbreakingly, gut-wrenchingly painful. All those cover letters and equal opportunity applications wasted on some job that didn’t even appreciate your talent. Positive discrimination schemes feel just like pure negative discrimination when you don’t get the job. They couldn’t see your worth; they didn’t deserve you anyway.

7. You start considering selling out to the corporate life

Your friends ask to catch up to celebrate getting new jobs, moving into new houses and even getting married. Meanwhile you’ve got an account balance of £2.00 and it’s supposed to last you for the next month. Adulting wasn’t supposed to look like this.

8. Finally you get a job

You made it to a real semi-adult job. Allah had your back all along.

9. Adulting

So that’s it. You’ve officially become an adult (kind of). Now time to pay off all that debt you’ve racked up!