We asked our audience to share their love stories, tales of chance meetings, intentional steps, and everything in between. What came back was a mosaic of experiences, each unique yet equally exciting. Some spoke of stolen glances that turned into lifetimes together, others of introductions carefully arranged by family, and many of friendships that slowly unfolded into love.

This is our tenth story.

Please note that these stories are not for giving advice and are about documenting the lives of Muslim women who got married 🧡

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M&A

Did you meet online?

Yes

Please share how you and your husband first met?

We don’t really have a typical ‘how we met’ story. He was actually mentoring my business for a year, and that’s how we got to know each other. During the pandemic, we connected more deeply, and that’s when we realised we might just be a great match.

How many times did you meet in person before you got married?

First time with the family, second time he took me out, third time my family and I visited his place. That’s all.

How did your relationship evolve? What made you realise that he was the one and when did you decide to get married?

It was during the pandemic, when business had slowed down, and conversations weren’t just about work anymore. That’s when we began speaking more regularly about everyday things, what we liked, what we didn’t, how we saw life, money, and relationships.

We realised early on that while our belief systems didn’t always match, the way we viewed life had strong overlaps. That understanding brought a quiet clarity that maybe, just maybe, this could turn into something real.

We didn’t jump into marriage right away. Once we felt there was potential, our families met, we met, and then we spent more time with each other’s families and friends. Even after an initial ‘yes’ from everyone, we took our time. It wasn’t a rushed decision. We gave it a week to really think about it, and even after saying yes, we spent the next month quietly contemplating if this was the right step. Within three months of all those conversations, we got married, still processing everything, but also knowing this felt right.

What are your thoughts on premarital counselling? Did you get any?

Now that it’s been five years since we got married, we both genuinely believe in the importance of pre-marital counselling. It’s something we didn’t do ourselves, but looking back, we absolutely see the value it would have added. I think it can be a really vital way of ensuring you get to know your partner fully because you are forced to have the sort of tough conversations that often don’t arise until years into a marriage.

Having those guided conversations early on, with the help of an expert, can save a lot of confusion later.

Whilst we didn’t do it ourselves, because of the way we met we already addressed many of the important things like faith, finances, family before we decided to spend our lives together.  We do recommend it to anyone considering marriage now, though.

How long have you been married?

We have been married for five years now.

Has your perception of love changed before vs after marriage?

From where I see it, love really changes shape over time. Ours wasn’t a love marriage even though we knew each other; we weren’t in love then. We just saw potential in one another and chose to build something together. And love? It came after. And it keeps evolving.

It’s almost like love has seasons. At first it can feel exciting and new, but also nerve-wracking and uncertain as you first actually get to know your spouse. Then over time, it forms into something more comforting and consistent.

It might not be about being bowled over with excitement or romance every day, but it’s about being each other’s go-to person and the beauty of seeing your spouse navigate different phases of life like parenthood.

Before marriage, you assume love is the anchor, the constant. But once you’re in it, you realise love sometimes has to wait for responsibilities, for tough days, for survival. And that doesn’t make it any less real.

After four years of marriage, we had our first child and the kind of love I feel now is different from the one I felt on our wedding day, or the one I grew into in the early years. Each phase brings a new kind of love. And honestly, all of it matters.

What was the main thing you were looking for in a spouse?

One of the main things I was trying to understand while getting married was how open someone could be to seeing multiple sides of a situation, how much space they give for perspective, change, and complexity.

For me, it wasn’t just about who the person was in the moment, but how they would respond when life, marriage, and reality showed up in unexpected ways.

I needed to know if the person could hold all those challenges without shutting down. That mattered more than anything else.

What are three green flags Muslim women should look out for?

1. How he speaks about and protects his mother and sisters because that tells you what he really thinks about women. 
2. How he navigates difficult situations because that reveals his true personality. 
3. Whether he’s grounded in his deen. This isn’t just about ritual practice, or even level of iman, but about whether Islam is a guiding principle in his life and the foundation that he wants to build a future home and family upon.

What are three red flags Muslim women should look out for?

1. If he mocks or dismisses your decision to wear hijab, or not to wear it, that’s not just a disagreement; it’s a disregard for your bodily autonomy and your personal connection with your faith. Faith is personal, and how one expresses it should never be belittled. 
2. He has imposed religious views with mockery, pressure or manipulation. 
3. He doesn’t help his family with chores – because that tells you what kind of husband he will be.