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43 Friendship Red Flags: Is Your Friendship a Healthy One?

by in Relationships on 22nd August, 2022

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If you’ve subscribed to our newsletter, you know we have an exclusive Agony Aunt segment where we field dilemmas from the community and answer them as frankly as we can with love, truth and honesty.

Last week, one of you sent in a question wanting to know whether a friendship is over, requires some distance or some effort on your part. Read Aunt Maya’s response here and subscribe to our newsletter to get Aunt Maya’s advice on everything from love to spirituality and friendship in your inbox every single Friday.

We knew it was time to turn to the Amaliah Community and ask for your advice on the red flags to look out for in a friendship and as always, you came through with your stellar observations.

Click through to read all the responses here: 

You are not being treated right:

  1. They are only around when they need something 
  2. They’re not there for you when you need support or someone to vent to 
  3. When they keep giving you bad, potentially sabotaging advice 
  4. They gaslight you 
  5. They lash out at you and blame it on mood swings
  6. They backbite about others to you
  7. They backbite about you to your other friends
  8. You’re sensing passive aggressive behaviour
  9. You’re sensing surface level interest in your life
  10. You’re being belittled
  11. They are constantly cancelling on plans that you make the effort on 
  12. Everything feels one-sided
  13. They are constantly victimising themselves 
  14. They are not happy for your good news
  15. They are constantly making jokes at your expense
  16. They give you backhanded compliments
  17. They use you as a therapist 
  18. They do not make an effort to communicate 
  19. They constantly pick on your faults
  20. They take advantage of you 
  21. They are always fighting with other friends or don’t have any
  22. They ask very personal questions and get angry when you don’t answer
  23. They don’t give you any space
  24. They are obsessed with everything you do

They refuse to resolve conflicts in a healthy manner

  1. They shift all the blame on you when you try to talk things out
  2. They refuse to talk things out with you 
  3. They refuse to accept their own wrongdoings
  4. They pretend to be overly attached to someone as “revenge replacement” during fallouts

Your soul is at unease

  1. When your nervous system goes haywire at the mention of the person. Pay attention to your body! 
  2. You are constantly doubting yourself
  3. Your self-esteem plummets
  4. You have to mentally prepare yourself to be around them 
  5. You are more anxious than excited to see them 
  6. You have panic attacks at the idea of meeting them
  7. You don’t feel comfortable expressing your opinions in front of them
  8. You don’t feel comfortable sharing your feelings with them
  9. You are on edge around them 
  10.  You feel drained after seeing them
Amaliah Team

Amaliah Team

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